Knees trembling, losing track of time and space, the tiny (or not so tiny) orgasm, the phrase I NEED YOU, exploding in your head like fireworks. No this isn’t the beginning of a romance novel, it’s #allthefeels when its majesty, the perfect fall or winter boots, is presented before our eyes. And since the upcoming season has so much to offer, we decided to give you a pleasant… evening. Come ye, boots for all, every mood, every occasion. #Bootgasm! Read all about it.

• The Tumblr Boots. H&M, $59.95
  You most definitely need these. Super affordable and a huuuge hit on Tumblr, this boot comes in several variants, from ankle to knee-length, from glossy to classy-looking (faux) leather, and I have them. And I needed the empirical research; I decided to walk all over town in them to check for comfort, and OH MY GOODNESS! I’m pretty sure that I am minutes away from sleeping in them. Add how hot they make you look with minimum effort, and nothing’s stopping you from getting them.
• The Sergio Rossi Suede Boots. The Sergio Rossi Suede Boots With Feather Shaft, Stylebop.com, $1,930
  #Bootgasm. Boot-ga-sm. These are kind of pricey, but you know, who needs food when you have boots you can cuddle with! The heel is perfect and absolutely trendy, and I know it’s very possible that you don’t have boots in this color. For those who like to pimp up the collection, we chose the Sergio Rossi Feather Shaft.
• Biker Boots. H&M Leather Boots, $99
  If you’re like me and convinced that sneakers or ballet flats water down your sexiness, then you have my support. Us not-quite-so-athletic girls need to stick together, which is why I’m throwing this comfortable fashion miracle your way. I’m not even going to think that you don’t have a pair already, but have you seen the variety of colors and models and what you can do with them? You can look both sexy and badass AND walk long distances. And dance. And run. And everything.
• The Ugg Boots. Ugg Australia, $275
  It may be old news, but it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t bow before the Ugg boot. You know why. Even men learned why. Even the ever-enduring haters of Ugg boots know why. Because it lets you look baggy, yet fabulous. Who does that? Who goes perfectly well with grocery shopping, AND coffee with friends, AND snowy days, AND looks adorable at the same time? The Ugg boot, ladies. How many do you have, actually?
• The Thigh-Length Boots. Betsy Johnson, $169
  And now, boots royalty. Two words – thigh-length. It maybe a risky thought, but I somehow get the idea that if people give you a raised eyebrow every time you wear boots, it means you nailed it. And thigh-highs can make eyebrows fall off if you nail them. The beauty of internet is that you’re always a click away from the best ways to combine them with fantastic outfits and not cross the line of trashy. Because these babies are brave and finding the perfect combination with them is practically an art. And we’re all artists here, you know that.

I really am sorry if this article forced you to get up, get dressed and go shopping. Actually, I’m not. You’ll love me later.